Meet the flatmate: Swiper

This is Swiper. Possibly the Most Annoying Cat in the World. Named after the Dora the Explorer character and because she swipes at ya if you get too close. Not the most personable cat I’ve ever met. Can you say personable about some’one’ that isn’t a person? Ah well, I can. I stated in Tobin’s episode of “Meet the Flatmate” that he was the newest member of our flat. Well, I lied. Swipey came about a month after him.

Without fail, every morning at around 6am Swiper turns up at our door (before the Devil Child even rouses herself from her slumber) and meows continuously until she drives Tobin around the bend and he is forced to get up and feed her. Let it be known that the cat actually belongs to Gaz, it’s just she’s not stupid and knows the chances of Gaz and Jute waking up to her meowing is about the same as the chances of them waking up to one of their 50 alarms that go off in the morning. (Which incidentally, wake everyone in the house EXCEPT them!)

Anyway, the food used to work. Now she’s decided that a 6am wakeup and delicious (*bleugh*) catfood isn’t enough for her. She returns to our door and starts meowing again. Non-stop. Did I tell ya she’s the most persistent cat I’ve ever met? Her next trick is to try and get the door handle. We can hear her take a run up, *pit pat, pit pat, pit pat….. BANG* as she launches herself up to the door handle. Now, I can handle a few cat paw-steps, but the sound she makes as she hits the door isn’t exactly sleeping material. Neither is her meowing, come to think of it. But she’s after attention and nothing will stop her. Luckily it is usually 7am by then and we are forced out of bed by freezing Devil Child limbs anyway.

Swiper is also a little crazy in the evenings. Around 9pm she goes absolutely nuts and literally climbs the walls. Or the drying rack. Or the curtains. This photo shows evidence of a wall attack. That bald patch on the wallpaper – Swiper’s doing. (Oh yeah, and the bald patch on Swiper is where they shaved her fur for her de-sexing operating yesterday)

I just hope, hope, hope that she grows out of her kitten phase soon and gets into the highly lazy routine of sleeping all day. That’d suit me fine.

In other news, here are some photos of the Devil Child and her artwork.

I was commanded to take this photo in the nicest possible way. “Take a photo of me! Smiiiiiile!”


This is Hannah’s early morning art work. Apparently it’s “Mummy’s red face”. I’m not quite sure what she’s getting at. I think I prefer to remain ignorant.

I decided after seeing how much of an interest that the Devil Child was taking in photography, that I’d nurture that particular talent and see what she came up with. I sent her out on a walk with Tobin and she came back with a few snaps. This is a work entitled “Pegusus trapped in a bubble.” I love the way she has juxtaposed the vertical lines of the building with the round smoothness of the sign and then added narratives of entrapment around the freedom that the winged horse symbolises. 😉

So yes, I’ve high hopes for this one. How else am I going to take early retirement if my child is not a famous artist?

And here is the focus of my hopes and dreams being who she really is… a two-year-old.

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4 thoughts on “Meet the flatmate: Swiper

  1. what a serious bunch of cuteness this post was. I like the bald patch on the kitty too. Very ‘alternative’ in an I-shave-my-cat kid of a way. hahaha. but really, what a cutie.As for Hannah cute and talented to boot! Can’t get much better right?Wishing you both a glorious day! x

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  2. If it makes you feel better – my kitty is 7 and still runs up the curtains (and Al’s clothes, because he never shuts his wardrobe door) on a regular basis (preferably, for her, at about 2am). She will also get into the linen (sp?) cupboard and use her back legs to ‘paddle’ (like a dog digging a hole sort of thing) all the linen out of the cupboard into a heap on the floor. Bless.I wouldn’t have her any other way. When she was hit by a car last year, I was heartbroken that her little personality might be missing from our lives. Lucky, she’s very tough! 🙂

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