Things that make you go…

(*^$k%*(f(*#FJ()*)()(*@^)R)_*)@&

I’m trying my bestest to tone down my language. In real life, both at home and at work and online.

But this morning my noble quest came to an end when I somehow managed to jam my tooth brush under my tongue and tear (what google has just helpfully informed me is) my frenulum linguae.* Let me just say that a whole lot of not-so-lady-like words came out of my mouth at that point and then again at regular intervals since.

It was funny as Hannah was in the room brushing her teeth as well (and my lack of concentration may have been because I was trying to convince her that walking up and down the bathroom counter while brushing her teeth wasn’t actually a good idea) and heard my explosion of blasphemy and profanities. She simply inquired “why did you say “arghhhhh” mum?” … Good girl. Ignore the litany of expletives. That really has been my tactic thus far with all things parenty. There is no way that I have been able to eliminate undesirable behaviour from Hannah’s life. Between her foul-mouthed mother and various flat mates and their friends playing a large part in the kid’s life, she learned about swear words very early on. My mission has been to expose her to this type of behaviour and then educate her on appropriateness… or inappropriateness as it were. She does test the waters every now and again, but for the most part seems to just filter it all out. Works well for me!

Anywayyyy… back to me and extreme amounts of pain in the tongue region. There was blood… a lot of it, but I survived. Although death may have been a preferable option due to the fact that I can not TALK without stretching my poor damaged frenulum linguae. It seems I may enunciate more than the average bear. Or maybe I just talk funny. And apparently I also put my tongue in strange places while I drive! Who’d have known? It really is an exercise in self discovery when you maim your tongue.

So I can’t talk. Well, I can and I do, but I am trying to limit myself. So in actual fact this whole injury really is making it easier not to swear. Bonus.

And so the lesson for the day: pay attention while brushing your teeth.

*I just decided to check the term and googled ‘frenum’. Apparently there is also a frenulum that relates to genitals. Glad I checked that one out and managed to differentiate between the mouth one and the genital one. Could have been quite embarrassing if I’d pretended to be all knowledgeable about this stuff with my work mates. Glad it hurts to talk at times like these!

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5 thoughts on “Things that make you go…

  1. My immediate thought was how’d you hurt <>that<> while brushing your teeth =) even though it was quite obvious you were talking about something different…

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  2. Woah. It even sounds painful eh ‘frenulum’. Or it could be a nasty swearword.. . Poorest you. I think you deserve a couple days off your freezing work hon. But then what would buspeople do without your sweet swearing and gossipping… Hey i sure hope your friends religious parents don’t do crafty blogs…Lies

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