So… had my first contemporary dance class tonight. Hmmmm. Interesting experience.
From the moment we started, all the horror of dancing throughout my childhood came back to me. It was the “And 5, 6, 7, 8…” bit where I go “Ah feck. What happens on 1 again?”.
I have always joked that dancing was the only thing that saved me from being a completely uncoordinated eedjit. Now I’m back dancing I realise that even that isn’t gonna save me.
I firmly established myself as the class gumby within approximately 5 minutes. That’s no mean feat I tell ya! A serious lack of coordination and inability to follow simple dance routines is required.
The class gumby also decided that she didn’t quite give a crap what the just-out-of-high-school classmates thought of her so she danced her little heart out anyway and will practise ‘instruction recall’ extensively before the next class so she can actually remember what step follows “and 5, 6, 7, 8”. The class gumby will also attempt to stop referring to herself in third person.
So yeah, I alread have the first of many bruises that has come out. And where, may I ask, would it be logical for a bruise to appear after contemporary dancing? Your knees, you say? Perhaps your feet? No. Apparently not.