Thank you ninja phone

I was forced to lick the spoon. Really. And bowl… and before that, to eat most of the mixture. Which reminds me, I really must adjust all my recipes to compensate for the fact that I eat most of the cookie dough even before we actually get to the dough part. Hrmmm.

So, anyway, I made snickerdoodles.

Unfortunately for me, Hannah wasn’t around to eat most of the mixture herself and subsequently require restraint from her mother in the name of modelling desireable behaviour. So in that vein of thought, it’s totally Hannah’s fault that I ate all the dough.

But never fear my friends. I have magic scales! I’ve been marvelling at them all week when I decided to actually step on them for the first time and found myself at 53.1kgs! (I am way so not 53.1kgs. Not even close.) So there I was, planning this blog post, and going to post a picture of my weight after lamenting how sick I felt from eating all that cookie dough… and then feeling smug when the scales read 53.1kgs.

Then I thought, hrmmm… wonder how far out these scales actually are, and so prepared to weigh Dion’s weights to calculate how far out the scales were. Genius idea no? The weights = 7.3kgs. Brilliant. So I went to find my phone to text Dion to see how much the weights ACTUALLY weighed because in my wisdom, despite knowing exactly how much the actual weight parts were, I’d neglected to realise I didn’t know how much the bar weighed. Idiot.

But then my stoopid ninja cell phone decided to stealth off. No idea where the hell it is. Putting another spanner in the otherwise-quite-genius-and-mostly-foolproof plan I had come up with.

In the mean time, I decided to weigh myself.

Marvel at that 54.5kgs babies! (Not my feet)
Or at least I was marvelling at that 54.5kgs until I realised that I’d weighed myself this morning at [a ridiculously inaccurate] 53.1kgs. Holy crap people! The snickerdoodles were responsible for an extra 1.4kgs! If we consider that I’ve been drinking bugger all water today, and haven’t really done anything else that would cause my weight to increase significantly, bar eat a whole pile of saturated fat and sugar. Man alive. Lucky they were good.

So, while I am quite appalled at the weight gain that Hannah was somehow responsible for, I am now eternally grateful that my illusive cell phone can not currently be located, lest I know my true weight. While I can’t find my cell phone and text Dion to find out how magic my scales really are, I can remain blissfully ignorant of the fact that I probably shouldn’t have eaten all that dough and have another snickerdoodle.

Next post: Nikki’s crash diet

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7 thoughts on “Thank you ninja phone

  1. people change weight during the day, so for consistency you always need to weigh yourself at the same time and on the same scales.

    morning after going to the bathroom is best

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  2. ha. I like your lil left toe. Looks so cute out on the left side by itself. πŸ˜€ and your second biggest on your left foot.. its saying hello to your big toe. Dunno what the rest of the post said. hehe

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  3. DAMNIT. Knew I shouldn't have put my feet on the internets. No good things can come of this πŸ˜›

    And I think my little toe is the result of kicking a bookshelf many years ago πŸ˜›

    Like

  4. man that jute, she is smart. but your camera weighs a kilo and a half? that's some badass camera.

    anyway i was just coming through from my reader to say ha. you funny.
    even if i can't talk to you because you are about half my weight. pish.

    Like

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