I’ve been yelling a lot lately.
The child hasn’t been particularly good at listening and I’ve resorted to yelling to try and get her to do the things I expect. I’d really like to yell less.
I have always tried to treat Hannah the way I’d like to be treated. And I wouldn’t like to be yelled at.
I believe that yelling erodes the trust that a child has in an adult. I really don’t want to get to the point where Hannah is a teenager and wonder why she doesn’t tell me things. That thought distresses me.
When she’s older, I want Hannah to be the kind of person who is confident enough to make the right choices. For herself and for other people. I want her to be patient, compassionate, responsible(ish), and happy. This requires modelling good behaviour, encouragement, praise, attentiveness and patience.
Tonight it’s all just a bit overwhelming. That the road to being a good person is to be built bit by bit, every day. But it’s so freaking long. It’s a thousands of single days of “brush your teeth!”, “bring in your school bag!”, “tidy your room!”… and tonight? I just don’t think I want to do it.